# 3 My IVF Journey

The failed IUI is now 4 years ago, almost to the day. Because of the length of time in between, we have been investigated again. The process has taken nearly a year. When we went through the IUI, we were tested within the fertility unit at our local hospital, now times have changed and everything has to be done through the GP before you can be referred to the hospital. In hindsight, we should have kept on the GP's back a little bit more, but I never liked using up time slots where people much more in need could have had my appointment. It's not the end of the world, but it took quite a few months more than it needed to. Numerous blood tests, semen samples, weight checks and body MOT's, we were finally given the go ahead to choose between our local fertility clinics. In our area, we can have one round on the NHS. We are choosing to pay to have everything frozen so that if it fails we can still have one more attempt, it's still classed as the first round! If it works, we have the option of another child in the future.

The toughest part of this process so far is knowing who to tell and what to tell. I'm a person who very much wears my heart on my sleeve, my husband on the other hand is a closed book!! He hasn't told his family, just in case it doesn't work and we have constant messages and calls asking how it's gone. Me... I'm not so good at keeping things from people. I started off OK, told a small white lie and said that things will be starting up in the spring, when actually we will have had it by then. Then I couldn't remember who I'd told what. People wouldn't understand why I'm not drinking and celebrating, or why I'm quiet and not myself and now I'm pretty much sure everyone in my close circle does now know. The way I look at it, I've found it's much less stressful, hopefully I won't regret it in a few weeks time. My work has been amazing. Helped very much by the fact that my manager is my best friend. We had agreed that our fellow colleagues didn't need to know and that when it came to me needing the time off, we would just reach that hurdle and address it however we could...I lasted only a few shifts before I blabbed. That's the thing with hormones, you just don't think straight.

My LMP (last menstrual period) was 10th February.

My first day of medication started on 2nd March.

I've been put on;-

*Norethisterone 5mg x3 daily for the first 7 days

*Suprecur (Buserelin) 0.3ml daily

*Gonal F 225iu daily in the morning

*Ovitrelle - Trigger injection, to be taken at a specific time advised for the egg collection.

*Cyclogest 400mg x2 daily after the egg collection.

So, they give you a list of side effects, but my gosh, some need to be added. For example "headaches" does not quite cut it, "you will feel like your head is going to explode" is more like it. Sensitivity to noise and light I've also found. As expected, yep, depression took a big hold a week ago. I sat and cried the biggest river for pretty much 2 solid days and they are still coming and going as easily as turning on a tap. When i wasn't crying, i could so happily strangle someone (I obviously didn't, but may have wanted to). Completely irrational hormones I'm ashamed to admit, could fly off the handle at the smallest thing, my husband is a saint for standing by me still!

The stomach cramps not long after taking the tablets, were like a typical bad period pain, but continued right up until a day or so into my planned period. I am still very slightly spotting even now and it's been over a week, but the pain is gone. Sorry for TMI, but as expected 3 days after the Norethisterone tablets were finished, I had a period. Now when i say period, it was not a normal period. I bled so much it actually scared me. Clots came out of me so big I thought I was passing worms!! Thankfully I found info on chat forums of stories from many other women experiencing the same, very odd that there is no mention of this in any of the paperwork provided by the clinic. I have however since discovered that the Norethisterone is used to empty your womb to make it as perfect as can be for the transfer. (A little heads up to anyone using that in the future!!)

The Suprecur is fine. I'm not entirely sure which medication is the culprit for the depression, but I am putting my hot sweats down to the Suprecur. My husband likes to get involved and "do his bit", (as he likes to put it!) by checking that I've got no air bubbles in my syringe after filling the dosage amount. I find that now with the sensitivity of the area being used (I'm using my stomach as its the best area for me to pinch an inch) it's not so easy to get the initial entering of the needle (you know when you need to pull off a plaster but you just can't do it, well it's getting like that).

The Gonal F = headache hell. Proper migraine. Not nice. The needle is thinner than the syringe needle, so enters much easier, however, the pen that it comes in is rather large, it is more than a handful, so makes things slightly trickier, especially when trying to press the button down, whilst watching the amount go down in the window and making sure your not moving it too much as this one stings my friends. My first day taking it, it made my eyes water, I was not prepared at all, whereas now, I'm managing just fine. On the odd occasion I'm having to have the Gonal F twice as my dosage is 225iu and the pen is filled with 300iu, meaning I need to use up the remaining 75iu. Fun huh! My stomach is very slightly bloated and a little uncomfortable, but completely manageable. The Gonal F injections have to be taken in the morning. I chose to have the Suprecur at 6pm in the evening to break it all up.

At the end of the day, there are people a lot worse off out there, with conditions that will see them needing treatment for the rest of their lives. Remember this if the hormones are taking over you one day and the injections seem a bit much! It's a few weeks, YOU CAN DO THIS!!!

On the 14th March, I had a scan to see how things were going. The nurse is happy with how my womb has shed and my follicles were looking good. 10 follicles on one of my ovaries and 9 on the other, looking into it, that is just above average for my medication program, so things are looking positive!! I still have the next 5/6 days of injections before it's my final scan... Fingers, toes and everything crossed. Positivity right now is key for my mind set!

The Gonal F Pen Injection